papayaseason:

you really can’t trust girls who don’t value sisterhood. just pray for them and keep it moving.

(via badgrade)

"

You would think that Andrew Jackson was giving you his undivided attention, and then you would glance over and notice that he had devoted the last several minutes to making a laborious sketch of an alligator.

“Mr. President!” you would gasp, indignantly.

“I have a bullet lodged inside my body,” he would say. “From killing a man in a duel. A better man than you.” He would resume drawing the alligator.

"

-On Presidential Doodlers

Said alligator:

image

(via thedancingtoast)

(via mooseandtrenchcoat)

snooki:

why fall in love when you can fall back asleep??

(via garekisan)

disvalue:

girls who like being choked during sex are neato

(via fuckyeahsexanddrugs)

aminaabramovic:

aziz ansari’s voice in the back of my head faintly telling me to treat myself is going to be my downfall

(via dreambeyond-thestars)